We woke up like any normal day, however, knowing that I wasn't going to be able to eat once we arrived at the hospital I had one large breakfast request! Donuts!! So Blake & Mason set off to fulfill my request while I got last minute things ready. We all stuffed our faces with as many donuts as we could possible have, packed the car, snapped a few last minute pictures and were off to drop Mason off at the sitter & have our baby. After the sitter there may have been a stop at McDonald's for a breakfast burrito too. No judging I wasn't about to go hungry!
So let me just set you up with our "plan" of how this was going to go. Remember from above type A person, have to have a schedule and a game plan. (Did I mention I even sent videos to my mom & sisters of how to use Mason's sippy cups in case they got stuck?? Type A!) Anyway, back to my plan. So I anticipated this labor would be quicker than Mason's for a few reasons. One being 2nd baby, two being I had way more contractions before going in & three I was dilated to a 2 and 50% effaced. Because this labor was going to be quicker I had already set up who was going to get Mason from the sitter. He was going to be the 1st one to meet his little brother or sister & then once we were all settled back in my room Blake would go home and put Mason to bed that night so he could stay on his normal routine. Also, if you recall Part 1 of Liam's birth story I commented that I wanted to have a natural birth. Although both Blake & our doctor felt it best that I have an epidural, I went into the day with the mindset that I wanted to see how far I could make it naturally and if I could then have a natural birth. Oh and also on this plan....baby would be going to the nursery at night when we stayed just like Mason did. Ok, so there you have it my best laid plans for this labor and delivery. If you listen carefully you can probably hear God laughing.
Once we arrive and get start getting checked in is where my plans immediately start to go south. One of the first forms they present for us to sign is: "we are a family friendly hospital now." Here I am thinking oh that's nice family is great. The nurse continues: "what that means is we no longer have a nursery so the baby sleeps in with you at night." WHHHHAAATTT?! Every bit of me wanted to say well I won't be signing that because Baby Brown will be going to the nursery but thanks. This terrified me!!! I remember like it was yesterday the amount of sheer exhaustion I felt after giving birth to Mason & how much of a saving grace the nursery was for us so I could get some strength back to then go home & care for my baby without the nurses. However, there wasn't a decline option so I signed all the forms and got myself tucked into bed & we got the show on the road. I'm still wondering thought if there isn't another option what good is signing a form saying you understand?
Immediately the doctor came in and broke my water and we started pitocin. Contractions took a while for them to become painful & when they started they didn't start in my stomach like they had been during pregnancy and in my labor with Mason. Rather, the contractions started as an immense amount of pressure. They picked up and things become much more uncomfortable as the day went on but I was determined to see how far I could make it. With Mason I wanted to the epidural immediately but this time I felt different. This time I just felt more comfortable without the epidural. No, the contractions were not comfortable, but I very much liked being able to walk around and sit on the birthing ball. I wasn't ready for my legs and mobility to be taken away from me yet. Around 2:00 I realized that what I once referred to as a 10 for pain tolerance was more on the scale of a 5 & I was dilating very slow. I had only dilated to a 5 and by this time with Mason I was fully dilated waiting for him to drop. I felt like the process was going so slow & I was in so much pain I just decided ok let's get the epidural and see if that relaxes me and speeds up the process. Around 3:00 I had my epidural and was feeling much relief. I was a little disappointed that another part of my birthing plan didn't work out but at that point the relief overtook the disappointment.
For the next couple of hours the nurses would come in & out checking things and switching me to different positions to help move labor along. My parents and family were in and out for the next couple of hours talking and helping pass the time. Around 4:15 I realized well....someone is going to have to go get Mason & I'm not very much further along (6cm) meaning that Mason can't come up to the hospital & wait so someone is going to have to take him home and miss being in the waiting room when Blake comes out to announce the gender. Then it hit my that Blake also wasn't going to be able to be home to put Mason to bed that night either AND that Mason would not only be the first one to see the baby but he wouldn't be seeing the baby at all that night. At that point it was cue the tears that absolutely nothing was going according to the way I planned it. Literally not one single thing. My sister & mom helped us come up with a new plan & Aunt Amy headed off to get Mason & take him home with her until Baby was here.
The entire time I had the epidural I felt like my left leg wasn't very numb at all & the catheter was very uncomfortable. The nurse continued to assure me that everything was ok and completely normal. Around 5:00 the nurses had had me sitting up for a while & my dad & stepmom were in talking to us & I started feeling that same pressure I had felt at the beginning of labor and thought hmm...this is strange. Then I realized that I could completely feel my left leg. Like it was not numb at all. I thought hmm well I can handle the pressure so no big deal. My dad & stepmom encouraged me to just call the nurse and have them check it out. I could tell that she still didn't quite believe that I could feel anything. She had me push the epidural button again and got me on the left side to get the epidural to drain over onto that side. She said if after 20 minutes I didn't feel any relief we would call the anesthesiologist back in to check it out. We made it about 5 minutes and I was almost in tears with pain so Blake called her back in to say lets go ahead and get this checked out. Blake and I were pretty set on it just being us in the delivery room but at that point complete and utter fear set in at the fact that I may be doing this all natural and I realized yep, this girl needs her mom too right now. When the anesthesiologist came back he immediately stated he didn't understand why it worked for so long and had all of the sudden stopped. At this point I was in tears with each contraction so there was no denying to anyone that this epidural was not working. He gave me a large dose of medicine to try to make the epidural effective again and it worked, however, within minutes it also made me feel dizzy and nauseous and my blood pressure went down to 80/42. In went more medicine to help stabilize my blood pressure and then about 15 minutes later the contractions were back. It was at that point that I realized ok, we are probably doing this thing all natural after all. It was definitely a shift in my mood at this point. I went from total fear to a mindset of you know what I can do this it's not so scary. It was also at this point that I felt like I needed to push with each contraction. The nurse (now a night nurse) checked me again and I was at an 8 and she assured me that there was no way I could push yet I needed to just breathe through it. Praise the Lord at that point she took out my catheter (ya know the one that had been driving me CRAZY since it was placed) to see if it would help & it worked wonders! Back in came the anesthesiologist who gave me yet another medicine in hopes that would get me through delivery and with that medicine came no relief at all. At this point because I had full control of my body (excluding my right knee down because ya know that's where it all settled & is important to be numb during delivery) the nurse let me get up to lay on the bed & rock back and forth like I would when I was most comfortable on the birthing ball. The anesthesiologist came back in for the final time he said "I just don't understand it was working so well what happened?" The nurse said "well they had her sitting up for a long time" & my anesthesiologist about came unglued saying "why would they do that? That's what happened!" I think my neck about broke at that point as I snapped my head over mid-contraction and said "THIS COULD HAVE BEEN PREVENTED?! I SURE HOPE SOMEONE SAID SOMETHING TO THEM!" He then said that the only thing that we can possibly do now is redo the epidural. One look at my nurse's face made me certain that yep this is really happening all natural. I was still on pitocin and my contractions at that point were coming too fast (about every 30 seconds) she said there was just no way for me to sit still long enough for a new epidural. Quite honestly, at that point I felt like well I've come this far anyway what's a little further.
The rocking back and forth actually happened to do just the trick and in no time I was dilated to a 10 and we were going to try to do a few practice pushes. I made it through half a push when she said woah woah woah stop, I promise you this baby will be out in no time let me call the doctor. I had a small side conversation with Blake when nobody was looking and made sure it was ok if mom stayed at that point because quite honestly I felt like I just needed 2 people. If one went to get ice I needed the other to stay there so I could squeeze the life out of their hand. He assured me it was fine & then I got a wild hair and said "why don't you facetime your mom?" I remember the look on his face was comical as he said "now?! I don't really think this is a good time." (hahaha!!!) I actually meant that if my mom was in there it was only fair for his mom to be able to experience it too. So we facetimed her in and put her up by Blake & my mom to experience the birth of our 2nd baby. When the doctor came in I can honestly say I don't think I've ever been so relieved to see her. I remember my first words were "well the next patient that says they may want to try it all natural tell them careful what they wish for." We got a good laugh out of that & then my final remark was "I swear there is no way this baby is not a girl with the amount of drama we have had today."
At 8:38 I started pushing and at 8:40 (2 contractions later) out came our little baby. This was such a different experience for me than Mason's birth because I could feel everything. I felt like pushing was easier because I wanted/needed that baby OUT! I also didn't realize Mason was out when I had him but I knew the second this baby was out and I just wanted to snatch him up. I just remember saying over and over "I want my baby, I want my baby."
Here's the part where you remember Blake & I were so certain that we were having a girl. When the doctor said what is it dad he slowly said "Its.....a......." by that point I looked up and saw the little boy parts on my Liam Hayes as he said "boy?" Yes, the question mark there is intentional. I could tell he was extremely confused. But truth be told, we both deep down inside were hoping for a boy. Yes, we loved our girl name & a girl would have been fun. But we wanted a brother for Mason so bad, a friend, another boy seeing as Mason was the only one on both sides of our family.
As they laid him on my chest I noticed that he wasn't crying and the nurse kept saying "ok we need him to breathe now or we need to take him, we need him to breathe" my tears of joy turned to tears of fear as they scooped him off of my chest and out of the room. I remember yelling at Blake "GO WITH MY BABY!!" as our doctor tried to assure me that he was going to be just fine, he was just a little shocked. Apparently he did not have an easy delivery himself. The entire side of his body (I believe his left side) was completely bruised, his face was bruised & his head had several scratches on it from my bones. When he came out his head was tilted and Mom & Blake both said they were thinking ummm what's wrong with his head?! Only to notice it was his ear when the doctor turned his head correctly. When his head came out he had the cord wrapped around his neck which was why he wasn't breathing on his own. As soon as they got over there & messed with him a little he was breathing just fine and our perfect, slightly banged up, 8lb 3oz 20 inch Little Liam Hayes Brown was put back in my arms and my heart overflowed. (Side note, it was amazing to me how CLOSE these 2 boys were in size. Mason was 8lbs 4oz 20.25 inches long)
After I got settled we were able to Facetime with Blake's family then once my sister Amy made it back to the hospital (thank you to my Brother in law Tim for watching Mason & missing out on the moment) Blake got to go out and share the news with my family. Which, funny enough all (excluding my biological parents) were dead set that little Liam was a girl too.
1. If there is a next time I will 100% have a natural birth because I know what to expect, I know how to do it & the recovery was WAY easier! Also, I hated not having control of my body!!
2. Sometimes everything does not according to your plans and it will all be ok.
3. This was living proof to me that God does not give you more than you can handle. God knew the desires of my heart that day and he also knew that I was stronger than I thought I was. It was a feeling of God believing in you and giving you the desires of your heart even when you don't believe in yourself.
Welcome to the world Liam Hayes, Mama, Daddy & Mason love you more than life!
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